I had an amazing/magical moment yesterday. I had just got home from doing a Leadership training. Rock Solid Leadership: The 7 Secrets to Pain-Less Leadership.
Anyhow, I got home and although I had agreat meeting I was having a moment of doubt.
Am I doing the right thing?
Should I go back to Corporate?
I started speaking aloud to god or whomever those exact things and said outloud I’m following my heart and it feels good but is this what I’m supposed to be doing????
I picked up a book called “Signs” by Doreen Virtue.
As I opened the book a broken piece of a shell a little bigger than a grain of sand fell on my chest (my heart) and that broken piece of shell was a heart.
I guess that’s my sign that I’m doing the right thing. It truly made me smile!
I had to share in with you…

Exercise 2: Make Peace with Perfection

Are you hung on life’s imperfections? Let’s find out!

For each answer, score 0 for never, 5 for sometimes, 10 for most of the time.

1. When you’re a guest at someone’s house, do you straighten the pictures?  0

          – Can’t say that I ever done that

2. After a maid has cleaned your home or hotel room, do you look for dust?   0

          – I only wish I had a maid!! J I have never checked my hotel room.

3. After you get your car professionally detailed, do you go over it?              10

          – Hell yeah, I paid good money for that! Plus, one time a cheap car wash place       

          put a brillo pad to front of my car…seriously what were they thinking!

4. Do you look for typos or grammatical errors in reading material?              0

          – Have I noticed them yes have I looked for them no

5. Do you mentally “correct” the outfit or makeup of people you meet?                  5

          - Yeah of course I am a girl! Kidding aside, sometimes I just can’t help it

6. Before you start eating in a restaurant, do you wipe the silverware?                   0

          – I’ve never wiped it but if it looks dirty I ask for new silverware

7. Do you complain to the restaurant manager about the service?                           0

          – Personally I never have but I’ve been with people that have

8. Do you correct aloud other people’s grammar or pronunciation?                5

- Sometimes I totally do. My dad always used to correct me on the difference between well and good. So if you hear me say it’s not I’m doing good it’s I’m doing well…thank my dad! Lol

9. Do you worry about making such mistakes in your speaking and what people will think of you if you do?                                                                              10

- I speak in front of people for a living so I try my best to speak correctly and to make a good impression

10. Do you analyze aloud “what’s missing” from a recipe at a friends house? 0

          – I don’t really cook so that what does really count for me…hehe

11. Do you worry excessively about pleasing others with your own cooking?    10

Yes, I’m more concerned that it may taste horrible and that I’ll get banned from the kitchen. Again not much of a cook

12. Do you point out to your boss minor errors in a finished project or presentation, even though they make no difference?                                                          0

- If it’s finished and doesn’t make a difference then no. If it was important and was going to affect the presentation then absolutely

13. When you’re watching a TV show or a movie, do you tell the other viewers how you would have made it differently?                                                              0

          - Nope. I don’t really watch TV. Weird, right?

14. Do you criticize the behavior of celebrities?                                         5

          What’s up with Angelina, Brad and the 20 thousand kids anyways? Lol

15. Do you mentally redecorate rooms, other than in your house?                           5

          - I’d be lying of I said no

16. Are you constantly dissatisfied with the way your own living space looks?           5

- I actually love my house but it’s a work in progress and will probably forever be

17. Are you constantly dissatisfied with the way you look?                                     5

          - Again I am a girl. Dissatisfied? No. Always wanting to improve? Absolutely.

18. After you pass a tastelessly dressed person, do you comment to the other person your with?                                                                                            5

          - It may have happened I have to admit

19. After you attend a party, do you criticize other guests?                         5

- Not really. I’m normally really happy that I’m at a party! I guess it’s probably happened before though

20. Do you redo unimportant things that other people have done?                 0

- No way! I don’t even have time to redo important things that I have done wrong!! Kidding…but seriously who has time for that

21. Do you give unsolicited advice to people about what they should do?                  5

- I try my best not to. You should only give it when asked I know so I do my best not to

22. When you’re telling someone about a wonderful vacation, do you feel you must include the little things that went wrong?                                                     0

- I don’t want to remember the little things that went wrong let alone focus on them again. Yuck!

23. Before you buy something, do you spend a long time trying to find the best? 10

-  I am competitive and played sports my whole life. I love being the best of best

24. After you buy something, are you worried that you didn’t get the best?    5

- It may be a passing thought but honestly after it’s been bought it’s time to move on.

25. Do you often straighten things? (desk, utensils, tools, etc.)                    5

          It’s actually an area that I’m working on. Not so good at that stuff

26. Before you leave the house, do you mentally criticize your appearance?    5

          - It’s probably happened more than once

27. Do you often ask friends to reassure you that something you have done is ok? 5

- Maybe. I do like my boyfriend to tell me I’m beautiful and that he loves me a lot…lol

28. Before you fall asleep, do you think of all the things you didn’t do that day? 0

          – I normally think of all the things I have to do the next day

29. Do you take mentally inventory of your faults?                                                10

- All the time. I’m really big into self help and if I don’t look at my faults I can’t grow and become better

30. Do you find it hard to accept a compliment?                                        5

          - Not really I love them!! I used to though and from time to time I probably do

Scoring:

Less than 100: you find the world a satisfying place

100-150: you’re fairly easygoing

150 -200: you may find people avoiding you

200-250: you could be a paid critic

250 or more: Yikes!

My Score: 120

How did you do?

Rules: Statements are presented in sets of 3. Each one has a point value. Read all 3 statements and decide which one best describes your situation Then write the point value in the space beside that statement.

1. When someone has more than ten items in the express line at the grocery store, I…

___ point out the person’s error and suggest that they choose another line (1)

___ don’t let it bother me (3)

_X_ get annoyed and feel sorry for someone who is so inconsiderate of others (2)

2. The cable goes out in the middle of along awaited show, so I…

_X_ shrug my shoulders and say it will be on again (3)

___ rant and rave about how disappointed I am (1)

___ call the cable to report the problem (2)

3. After purchasing food at the drive-through window, I realize my order is wrong. I…

___ go back and yell at the manager and demand a refund (1)

___ complain to everyone around me and pick up my food (2)

_X_ eat my lunch and enjoy it anyway (3)

4. Someone is talking in the movie theater. I…

_X_ shush very loudly (2)

___ move to a new seat (3)

___ inform the manager (1)

5. When I lose change in a vending machine, I…

___ never kick and shake the machine, but try another (3)

_X_ sometimes kick the machine and shake the machine, depending on how hungry I am (2)

___ usually kick and shake the machine – I hate feeling ripped off (1)

6. In a crowded lot, I notice that someone has parked in 2 spaces. I…

___ leave a note on the person’s car, pointing out how inconsiderate he or she is (1)

___ entertain thoughts of scratching the car, but drive on (2)

_X_ drive on until I find another parking spot (3)

7. One morning, the paper is late. I…

_X_ go on my morning and decide to read the paper during dinner (3)

___ call the distribution office and let them know (2)

___ get frustrated and upset because my morning routine has been interrupted (1)

8. At a restaurant, I notice that people seated after me receive their meals first. I…

_X_ feel I am being overlooked and complain to the waitress (2)

___ reason that my food must take longer to cook and patiently wait (3)

___ lose my appetite and leave the restaurant (1)

9. A person is making an illegal left-hand turn in front of me. I…

_X_ honk my horn and make obscene gestures as I wait (2)

___ swerve erratically into the next lane to make my point (1)

___ deduce that the person must have a good reason to make the turn and wait patiently (3)

10. Only one window is open at the bank, and a large line is forming. I…

___ check my items to make sure my transaction won’t take long (3)

_X_ roll my eyes, let out a sigh, and check my watch (2)

___ complain loudly to the customers around me (1)

MY TOTAL POINTS: 24

Score:

21-30, you rarely sweat the small stuff

11-20, you still need some practice trying to see everything as small stuff

1-10, you let the small stuff get to you too often. Try to relax!

How did you do?

The other day I was at Barnes & Nobles and I came across “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff Workbook” by Richard Carlson, PH.D. It was on sale for $7.00 so I decided to pick it up and find out if I really do or don’t sweat the small stuff. Every Monday I will post the current exercise and my results. Please join me in the exercises and find out if you do or don’t sweat the small stuff.

Are you ready??? Here we go!!

Happy 7/11 everyone!! I just heard on the radio that it’s free Slurpee day at 711. Go and get ‘em!! I know I am. If you like Slurpee’s as much as I do you’ll think this is the best news EVER! Enjoy

Dear Bectacular,

I’ve been dating this guy for about 6 months. Things seem to be going pretty well. We get along great and we have a lot of fun together. However, every time we are out in public I catch him starring at other girls. It’s not just a glance; it’s the full body gaze. Occasionally I’ve even caught him striking up conversation when I’ve walked away. The only time I have his full attention is when we are alone. When I say something to him he just blows me off and says I’m the one that’s over reacting. I know what I’m seeing is more than a casual look. Do you think he’s cheating on me?

Dear Star Gazer,

Wow, that’s a tough call. Cheating? I can’t really answer that based from the above letter. However, you start out by saying that things are going well and then in another sentence you say he’s looking at other chicks instead of you. That doesn’t sound like things are going that well in my book.

It sound like you might be dating a Jack (AKA jack ass.) Sounds like your Jack has a classic case of: Can’t keep eyes in head.  I had one of those too and needless to say we’re not dating anymore.

You need to ask yourself, is it really ok with me that my guy checks out and talks to other chicks when we are out together?

If the answer is yes then we have some serious work to do sister!

It is completely inappropriate for you to be on a back burner when you’re out in public. You are front burner material girl and you need to believe that!

If the answer is no then you’re on the right track.

Give him the benefit of the doubt and confront him. Let him know what dating you is supposed to look like and this behavior is not going to fly. If he cares about being with you then he’ll stop doing it.

Either way it’s a win win for you. If he apologizes and works on it then you saved your relationship, hooray! If he blows you off and keeps doing it then its time to move on to someone who thinks you’re amazing!

The truth is you deserve to be treated with respect. There are plenty of guys out there that are willing to look at only you. If this one doesn’t dig you then find one that does! We all deserve the very best in life. Being with someone who gives you their full attention is a great start. Good Luck!

Remember, You’re a Totally Rockin’ Chick!

Bectacualr

The Girls Rock Network will be having their first event!

Who: The Girls Rock Network
What: Blah? Broken? Broke?
Learn the 7 Secrets of Being a Totally Rockin Chick
When: Sat. 6/27/09 from 12:30 to 2:00
Where: Slainte in Boynton Beach, 1500 Gateway Blvd. Boynton Beach Fl 33426 (561)742-4190
Note: Event will cost $7.00. Slainte will open up their menu for lunch orders. If you are hungry and would like to eat lunch you’ll be able to. Lunch is not included.
Hope to see you there!
For questions please call: 561-654-4824

“I like the dreams of the future better than the history of the past.”
~ Thomas Jefferson

When I read this I literally got the goose bumps. There something so true and inspiring about this quote, I just had to share it! I speak from personal experience but there was a time when I was so wrapped up in the past that I didn’t even have a clue as to what “I” really wanted for my future. Life was difficult and I kept facing the same challenges over and over again. I was so frustrated on the inside because I couldn’t break my cycle. My past was my present and that’s all there was to it.
Then one day I read a book that gave me permission to start dreaming again. Let me tell you something, once I had the permission to dream again, boy did I get creative! I also had a blast!
When we were kids we did this all the time. Yet somehow as we get older we get too wrapped up in our everyday lives to make this a priority. Dreams are absolutely the most important thing you can do for yourself. Dreams give you hope and determination for something bigger and better. I give you permission to dream and dream big! Who cares what other people think. It’s your future and you deserve nothing but the very best life has to offer!!

Dear Bectacular,

I currently live with my boyfriend and am getting to the point that I think he has a mistress. For the last 2 years he has worked 8-5 and couldn’t wait to come home to me. Lately he’s been talking about a specific girl from work quite a lot. On top of that he now “works late” and has “work functions” that didn’t exist before. Not only that but I’m never invited to anything anymore. I have also have noticed that they’ve been text messaging but I haven’t read anything yet. I only saw her name in his phone. My gut tells me yes but I just don’t know. We’ve been together about 2 years and I do love him. I’m afraid that if I say something and he’s not cheating on me it’ll ruin the relationship. Should I confront him or not?

Dear Miss Non-Confrontational,

Yes, Yes, Yes and YES! You totally need to confront him that is so not cool. Instead of accusing him of cheating why don’t you put the scenario back on him and say:

“Honey, I have something I need to ask you. How would you feel if I came home after a long day at work at talked about another dude? How would you feel if I always had to work late and excluded you from my work functions? Lastly how would you feel if on top of all that you noticed that we were texting?”

See how he responds. I guarantee roles reversed he would not be a happy camper. The fact that you’re excluded from the functions puts some doubt in my head. He should be treating you like a princess not leaving you at home alone.

Truth is any guy that is truly into you will find every way to be with you and not every way to be away from you. Before I even comment on the cheating aspects, it sounds like he has already made his decision to spend his time away from home. Stick to your instincts you already know its bad news even without another girl having to be in the picture.

Now do I think he has a mistress? It sounds like a good possibility that things could be moving in that direction if they aren’t there already. The bottom line is that it seems you’re not at the top of his priority list. Sounds like he has some priority shifting to do or he can shift himself right out of the equation.

Please do me a favor and protect your heart. Remember that you deserve nothing but the very best life has to offer. Anyone that says they love you should treat you as such. Being with someone who thinks you’re the top of charts is a good start. Good Luck!

Remember, You’re a Totally Rockin’ Chick!

Bectacular

“Good judgment comes from experience, and often experience comes from bad judgment.”
~ Rita Mae Brown

Everytime I read this quote I LOL! How true is that statement. Man o man I have had my share of bad judgement! Haven’t we all??? Hopefully it keeps us that much wiser for the road ahead.